What in the world is wrong with this character?!
I was entranced at a party recently as a twenty-something friend put off the advances of a too attentive young man.
I wanted her to bust his chops and put an end to our misery, but she was way too nice.
He was so focused that he didn’t notice that her friends, and at least one middle-aged mom-type, were paying close attention to his every move.
I have another twenty-something friend who quit her job rather than confront a guy at work who came on too strong.
So, here’s what I have to say to nice girls, “Quit being so nice!”
How? Here are some suggestions:
-Carry a knife in your purse. Nothing says “get out of my bubble” like cleaning your fingernails with a big, macho pocketknife. Just remember to leave it at home when you go to the airport.
-Ask a simple question, “Did you play football?” No matter how he answers the question, twirl around in “stiff arm” position and explain that he is taking a chance if he gets any closer than that.
-Sneak attacks? Don’t you just hate it when guys think they can approach you from the back and get in uncomfortably close? There’s a simple solution to that problem. Twist around quickly, put a knee in his groin and then say, “Oops! Did I hurt you?”
-Door strategy. If the guy stands in the doorframe of your car to prevent you from leaving, hit the alarm button on your key fob. Then say, “Back up please, I am leaving. NOW. That’s the signal.”
-Psychological warfare. Any guy that says, “You’re not nice,” is being manipulative. Your answer to that is “No, I am certainly NOT nice. Thank you for noticing.”
-Clarify the rules. Say exactly what you want him to know. For example, “Did I say you could enter my personal bubble?”
Most of the time you can clarify the rules with a simple statement as long as you smile. If you don’t laugh people will feel threatened, especially if you are cleaning your fingernails or picking your teeth with your bad-ass knife.
One last thought, if your mother would be offended about the way he’s acting, you should be, too. And it is best to let him know it. With a nice smile, of course.
Cathy Primer Krafve, aka Checklist Charlie, lives and writes with a Texas twang. Comments are invited at http://checklistcharlie.blogspot.com.
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